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The proposal

Sam and I decided last month that we are getting married on May 24th, 2008 in the Mount Timpanogos temple. He has been busy with school and I have been planning the wedding. Well, most of my work has been keeping my mom from taking over. Sam and I looked at rings and I told him to pick out what he wanted. He told me the ring was going to take six weeks to get ready. I wouldn't be able to get it until I came in March. I went to California for the long weekend to visit Sam. I hoped he was lying but I was convinced that he wasn't. Friday night we exchanged Valentine presents and he got me another antique lighthouse and it was so gorgeous! Saturday we met up with his family for dinner so that was a little scary but went well I thought. They are great! Sunday was the three month anniversary of our first kiss so I asked Sam to take me to the beach and we planned to find the perfect spot and time to propose. He had asked me before how I wanted him to propose since I already knew it was coming he had given up trying to surprize me. He said I could pick the spot and everything. He showed me the bag and box and sure enough it was empty so I was bummed but still having a great time. We went to the Santa Monica Pier and it was so beautiful! We watched the sunset and wrote in the sand. There were so many couples. It was like a big "In Love" party. Ha Ha As it started getting dark we walked up to the pier and look out at the ocean. It was amazing. The evening was perfect! We didn't ride anything because it was Sunday but it was still so much fun. It was getting cold so we decided to go back to the beach and pick the spot. We got back down there and finally found a spot where the sand was flat. We hugged and Sam was looking in my eyes and he said, "I want you to know that I think we are perfect together and I think you are the most beautiful girl in the world." I had to look away cause I was tearing up. Then he said, "I'm so glad I found you and I am glad you finally started paying attention to me." Then he knelt down, and pulled the box out of his pocket. I immediately began sobbing. He opened the box and it had a light in it that made the ring sparkle. "Will you marry me?" He said I cried for awhile before I answered. I was flipping out! Later on he told me he had a speech prepared but I was crying so hard that he knew I wouldn't hear or remember what he said. He gave me what he had wrote down instead. The whole thing is sort of a blurr because I was so excited but when we got home I wrote down as much as I could remember and Sam helped with the details. So there it is folks, the propsal. I am the luckiest girl in the whole world. In a few months I will be Mrs. Samuel Rivera.

So I know it has been awhile and I thought for sure I would blog more often but what can I say life is insane. So among the guys I met on ldssingle.com there was this one, sillysupersam. Every few weeks he'd send me one of those flirt things and it took me awhile to give him any attention because...well, he lives in California. He wasn't pushy or really flirty like all the other guys. He totally came out of nowhere and before long we were talking online almost everyday. That went on for awhile until I finally asked him if there was a reason he hadn't asked for my phone number. He admitted there was. He felt bad because of all the bad experiences I had had and he didn't want to push me. He figured I would give him my number when I was ready. Him saying that was the first time he really moved up in my book. He is really sweet and funny and I really enjoyed talking to him. We started talking on the phone but not too much because he is really busy with school. He is in his third year of Veterinary school at Western University. I liked him but he was totally not an option so I thought. He lives in California and I am moving back to North Carolina as soon as possible. He is fun to flirt with so I kept on talking to him. Then he sent me flowers while I was recovering from surgery (another blog I need to write) and totally shocked me. All along he had been saying he was going to come visit his brother in Provo for Thanksgiving and he'd like to take me out. I said sure but was totally thinking it was so far away that I doubted we'd still be talking then. Then it was here and I was picking him up at the airport. We spent every possible moment together the week he was here which included him holding my hand through a root canal. Of course I was so embarrassed when he asked the nurse to stay with me but thought it was so cute. At the end of each night I was surprised by how much I liked him but convinced myself he was not the one. When he left I called Meghan and Chad and told them my reasons that he wasn't the one. They both supported my decision but neither thought my reasons were very good. He lives in California and I don't. He's Hispanic and I don't know Spanish....I wouldn't fit in with his family. When he sent me a picture text of him driving back with his parents I knew what he said was true, I wasn't going to stop liking him just because he was in Cali. We started talking everyday. "If" this worked out what would happen and some days I was completely convinced it would and the next I was freaking out thinking I was crazy for getting so serious so quick. Now I know that since I am a hopeless romantic I tend to get swept up in, as Chad puts it, fairy tale crap. So alone with my thoughts I discussed with myself what it was that I liked about him. Sam is smart and he is really hard working. He sets goals and he is completely focused until they are complete. That might seem like a lame reason but I really admire it since I am the exact opposite. My actions are totally ruled by my emotions but he is in control of his. When I say something and he doesn't agree, he tells me. He has a mind of his own and unlike so many people around me he doesn't changed his mind just because of what I say. I can't bully him and I don't always get my way with him. Of course it drives me absolutely nuts and I am constantly battling my pride to not throw a tantrum. With a lot of prayer and pride swallowing I have come to realize that that is exactly what I need. I cannot possibly progress if I am with someone who gives me whatever I want. It is so hard though and I am honest with him about how hard it is. Sometimes I pout and he totally puts me in my place. It is hard to let him study when I want his attention for example. I am so rebellious that my natural reaction is always to pick a fight or walk away but I find myself willing to apologize. He is so respectful of me and I feel cherished. The feeling is so amazing that I could never go back to anything less. He is so much fun and I never have to fake laugh with him which is huge! I have never had so much fun with a guy. He is very active in church and he has a current temple recommend. I saw it when he pulled out his license once so that was a huge plus. I have prayed about him and I know he would make a great father and be an amazing husband. I love so many little things about him that I can't even put into words. I have no idea what he sees in me but I am the luckiest girl in the world! In June he starts his fourth year which will be a series of rotations at different animals hospitals. He is coming for a visit so we can pick the ones he is going to apply for. We hope to find time to get married this year. I know I know, this is crazy right?!?! I am sure it seems too quick and insane because believe me I freak out if I really think about it. Seriously though I love him and the truth is that I'd marry him tomorrow. That's the scoop guys and I hope things keep going the way they are because I have never been happier. Wish me luck!